Insight or Paranoia
Wednesday, 12th March 2014
It can be hard to tell the difference between paranoia and insight. Both have the qualities of being vivid, arriving with a sense of clarity and cutting through.
I believe the difference is the view.
Paranoia has an aspect of spinning out. It’s a powerful vehicle to launch into fantasies and make assumptions on meaning. He never loved me. She was out to get me. He’ll always be there. I knew from the beginning there was something off about this place. The thing with paranoia is that it separates us from truth. When it’s paranoia, if we believe in the thing we’ve ‘realized,’ then we pull back and put up our guard. And then from this protected place look at the world sideways, wondering where else deception lies.
Insight, however, is a whole other realm. Insight is expansive. It resonates and unfolds to deeper revelations so that the situation itself becomes metaphor. Insight is grounded in love, even if the message is painful. It’s about receiving the full picture, not simply scrutinizing the details.
But often, paranoia and insight are partners on the path to awareness. One can often be a gateway for the other. Often times, when we are triggered by an event, we fixate and harden on the details. We reconfigure our story into a paranoid frame of mind. Because the paranoia is claustrophobic, we blame everyone involved. But that doesn’t work, so we blame ourselves. We can’t eat. We can’t sleep. We’re miserable.
And then this small voice arises, ready to see a deeper truth. So we ask, what is really going on here? In order to hear it, we realize we’ve got to relax and breathe and stop acting out, because these only feed the paranoia. And so we learn to sit still or remain with the loss and practice patience. And then something else happens.
If we stay with the hell of our mind long enough to listen, insight comes.
Paranoia: No one can be trusted.
Insight: I am afraid to trust.
Insight: I don’t know how to trust.
Insight: I won’t let myself trust someone else.
Insight: What does trust look like?
Insight: Can I trust in this?
Paranoia: I’ll never find love.
Insight: I am the face of love.
Insight: Love resides in the body.
Insight: Nature loves me right now.
Insight: I am the other.
Paranoia: I am broken.
Insight: All parts of me are welcome.
Insight: My being is complete.
Insight: Where there is a break, there is space. Space is also part of me.
Denmo is the founder and CEO of Earthbody. She is a writer, artist, therapist, and coach. You can reach Denmo here.
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